Distractions

I have a four day holiday this week. Yesterday, Thursday, was Vesak Day and a public holiday here in Singapore. Today, our centre placed it in our calendar as a closing day. Tomorrow will be Saturday and of course the next day will be Sunday. I wrote on my notes what my plans would be for those days. I should have accomplished something by now. Ahhh, and here I am on my second day. What have I accomplished? I am beginning to believe I also have ADD. I am easily distracted nowadays. I can't focus. I should. I must. I need to finish my project on time.

I want to confess that though I was distracted, I also chose those distractions. I was distracted by the movie, The Pirates of the Carribean At World's End. We watched it days ago but still the image of Johnny Depp as Jack Sparrow is still lingering on my mind. Now, I am confused who I really like, Jack Sparrow or the real handsome Johnny Depp. Hmmm. Obviously, I'll be waiting for the part 4. I just hope that I'll not get sleepy in the middle of the movie. Oh, I know now why I am distracted. I can't believe that I fell asleep for a few minutes while watching the Pirates. There must be something wrong with the story line. What do you think?

My husband's photos from Gujarat distracted me. He sent me a lot of photos about that place in India. Imagining them made me think of the Philippines. Should I compare? I agree, I should write, see and say the positive side about my country. But on second thought, how can you see the beauty and positiveness when the ugliness created by humans are seen and observed so prominently?

I was distracted by TFC. How could I miss one show from another? A whole day and night of TV viewing made my documents waiting in vain. Tell me, how can I resist that Turkish man talking on TV and saying that word "brutus" to his famous Filipina wife? I imagined how I would be reacting if my ordinary husband would tell an ordinary me that I am a brute. Ahh, life!

The magazine, CNN Traveller consumed a part of my time too, especially the article by Anjali Rao titled Material Girl. Ms. Rao interviewed Imelda Marcos, the former first lady. Based on the interview script, I can say that I see a priveleged person still in denial. Hmmm, maybe she's saying according to her truth naman. Why should that be a distraction?

Ohh, I better concentrate on my report writing. Actually, who cares if I could not concentrate? Silly me. I may also have that delusions. LOL

I just want to say thanks for the mention Cathy of www.cathcath.com. My blog is still here because you alerted me. Thanks.

Ayy, naiba na naman flow ng topic. Am really is distracted.......

But I tell you, it is good to be distracted at times. Distractions made me appreciate life better.

The Verdict

Setting: Student Centre
Background: There are 5 children in the centre who attend tutorials. They are all attending the same school for girls and are all in P5(Primary 5). They are friends actually but in different classes. As they have the same assignments and lessons, their tutorial sessions are going smoothly. They are all able to help each other and discuss what are happening in their school. They all have the same likes and dislikes and are fond of gymnastics and ballet. The only thing that differs is that one of them is Eurasian.
The Story: Lane is a very accomodating girl. She can understand other girls' feelings, behaviour and nature. Though she is Eurasian, she tries to be in with the girls by accepting without malice what she sees hears and feels. She was not able to learn any local dialect so she always express herself in English. When one of her friends speak in English and the other answers in Mandarin, she will never ever show any discomfort. For her, there is no malice in having her friends speak infront of her in a language she can't even understand. So it goes on and on. They will speak mixtures of English and Chinese. But lately, it became a pattern that they all speak Chinese all the time. Hearing pure Chinese spoken infront of her, she feels uncomfortable. Not being able to take it anymore, she distances herself from the group.
The Consequence: The teacher noticed something wrong with the group. After some observations, she concluded that Lane was wrong in distancing herself from the group. She advised her to learn basic Mandarin.
The Verdict: Ahh, can I say something. I feel for Lane. And my verdict: that girl disrespected Lane. She is not a real friend. Why can't she speak English infront of Lane when she is also fluent in English? She got no manners.

And you know who you are. You got no manners!!!!

My best presents as a mother

Early morning of Mother's Day, I was thinking how my children would let me feel the importance of my being a mother to them. As they are already young adults, I was open to the fact that there were many changes in them as to how they look on life and on their relationship with me as their mother. Though those changes may be brought about by their life experiences, I was still craving for those primitive feelings and moments with them. And thankfully, I got them that day.


My eldest never failed me when she called from Virginia and let my grandkids speak to me. How wonderful it was to hear their sweet voices! My two daughters greeted me also. I am not materialistic of course. But the presents they gave me, made me happy, not because of the materialistic value but the love that came with each item, a new iPod and Shiseido products. A treat in Swensens also completed my day.














After that special day, I contemplated on my role as a mother. Am I really happy being a mother at this stage? Am I looking back to those days when they were little kids, where I was always the one whom they looked- up to? Am I not regretting the fact that I chose them over my career?

Hmmm. I admit the fact that I always cherish the days when they were just little children, where every word I said and every move I did were precious to them. Imagine how it feels to be the queen of their worlds. And ahh, they grew up now. They already have their own priorities and visions in life. They are already professionals in their own rights and earning more than what I am taking home. That makes me look like the "loser" in the family if salary will be the basis of happiness and success. Am I jealous then?

To tell you frankly, I enjoyed the stage when they were kids. And I also enjoy this stage where I am now. Being a mother to professionals made me more proud as a mother. Their "success" are just proofs of how I played my role passionately. I may be earning little than them but I am earning more love, more experiences, more stories to tell. Where will this stage in my life as a mother will lead me, is something I have to cherish also day by day.

So, let me tell you the precious gifts I got as a mother. My eldest, an assistant manager at Movado, my second a tax accountant for Price Water House Coopers (she just finished her last papers at RMIT and is scheduled to start this 1st of June), and my youngest a Software Engineer at ST. Yeah, I still remember my post about a close relative who always brag about her own. Why I am bragging mine? Ohh!!!

Now, is their being professionals the best presents I got? Oh No! I never said that! Honestly, whatever they attained educational and career wise, I'll still be proud of them. And what they become as persons are the best gifts I got. Being loving, caring and compassionate persons are the best gifts they gave me. And they are also the best gifts I can give to God in return.

Looking at my two daughters here in SG, and seeing my eldest being a mother too, make me appreciate my presents as a mother.

Lovely Bones on the big screen

I read this very good news courtesy of Yahoo. One of my favourite novel, The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold will be adapted into a movie version and to be directed by Peter Jackson. Surely, it will be an experience to see on the big screen Susie Salmon as she speaks from heaven.

Do read the entire news here:

LOS ANGELES -
Peter Jackson is teaming up with DreamWorks SKG to film his adaptation of the best-selling novel "The Lovely Bones."

DreamWorks beat out three other bidders — Sony Pictures, Universal Pictures and Warner Bros. — to finance Jackson's version of Alice Sebold's 2002 best-seller about the murder of a 14-year-old girl who narrates her tale from heaven.


Jackson, best known for the "The Lord of the Rings" trilogy, will direct from a script he wrote with his wife, Fran Walsh, and collaborator Philippa Boyens. The film begins shooting in October in Pennsylvania and New Zealand.


"In the hands of Peter Jackson, we have a master of cinematic storytelling to bring it to the screen," DreamWorks CEO Stacey Snider said in a statement announcing the deal Friday.
Financial terms were not released.


Jackson won three
Academy Awards in 2004 for "The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King." His other credits include "King Kong" and "Heavenly Creatures."

For the love of Spidey

Since we learnt that Spider-Man 3 would be shown on cinemas here, my family anticipated on watching it. My daughter tried to book for our tickets on the opening day, the first of May, but she was not able to book seats for four. So she booked for a later date; the following Saturday, 5th May. Unfortunately, my husband had to fly to Vietnam. So we paid for four tickets, but only three tickets were used. Hmmm, waste of money? Of course! But what to do? We tried to invite others but they had prior commitments. So, my daughter just gave it away to the cinema receptionist.

But mind you, though it was really sayang, the movie was enjoyable of course. It was also interesting and funny to see Toby Maguire's naughty Peter Parker dancing and flirting on the street of New York.

And if you want to send ecards of Spider-Man 3 to your friends, you can visit www.incinemas.com.sg/ecards.

Intimations of Mortality

I read this article as written by Ricky Lo in his Funfare column. I was inspired to take note of it not only because I really like Kris Aquino, but also because I had experience intimations of my own mortality. It was a very unforgettable experience which caused myriad of emotions on my part as brought about by the situation I was in and mostly because of that particular person. It was a learning experience for me and it really proved that God is really great. Just pray hard to God and surely He'll still let you be with your loved ones.

So, I want to share this article which you can also visit in ABS-CBN Interactive site.

To make up for her forced "leave" from the campaign trail because she had to prematurely deliver the four-pound Baby James (now weighing 4.6 lbs.), Kris Aquino showed up at the presscon Thursday night at the function room of the Imperial Palace Suites (Timog-Morato Rotonda, Quezon City) called by Regal Matriarch Mother Lily for Kris’ kuya Noynoy Aquino who’s running for senator under the Genuine Opposition banner.

Noynoy is among the 12 senatoriables (from GO, Team Unity (TU) and the "indies") endorsed by Mother Lily, including (at random) Chiz Escudero (GO), Loren Legarda (GO), Manny Villar (GO), Alan Cayetano (GO) (I deleted those names I don't like, sorry guys...)

Yellow dominated the whole function room that night, with Kris and Noynoy’s mom, former Pres. Cory Aquino leading the pack. It was Tita Cory (who arrived at 7 o’clock sharp ahead of everybody) who kicked off the affair with A Prayer For Noynoy she herself had written.
Also present were Kris’ husband, James Yap (looking visibly thinner by 10 pounds he said he lost during basketball practice), and her son Joshua who’s turning 12 on June 4, which is the date Kris will resume hosting the rudely-interrupted ABS-CBN game show Deal Or No Deal. She said she might not go back to her other shows, The Buzz and Pilipinas, Game KNB? (which is now hosted by Edu Manzano).

Still recovering from hypertension, a blood clot in her lungs and gestational diabetes (she’s taking half a dozen medicines), Kris revealed that during her last days of (difficult) pregnancy, she has had her own intimations of mortality.

"I had morbid thoughts," she said. "Akala ko mamamatay na ako. I had to ask James to pray The Rosary with me. The best lesson I learned from that experience is to keep your faith in The Lord. You can never go wrong with Him."

She said she has also realized that she really love(s) James who hardly left Kris’ side during those difficult moments and who has no doubt repented for whatever misdeed he had done. The couple has obviously let bygones be bygones. Good for them. Henceforth, they should listen only to each other and not to people out to destroy their marriage.

"Mahal ko talaga ang taong ‘to," said Kris.

Before the movie press could further "grill" Kris, she excused herself because it was Baby James’ breast-feeding time.

"Please write the complete name Noynoy Aquino on the ballot," she reminded everybody before she and James left.

At the start of the presscon, Kris said that if ever, she won’t make a bid for the Senate to avoid being accused of having two Aquinos in that body.

"I will run for President," she said

Adult ADHD

ADHD means attention-deficit hyperactive disorder. According to Edward C. Geehr, MD, it is not just a kids disorder. There is also adult ADHD. He added that in fact, about 65% of children with ADHD carry the disorder into adulthood, making it an adult problem as well.

Do you suspect that you may also have ADHD? Well, if yes, then you may be one of the estimated six to 15 million adults with ADHD.

How can you know that you have ADHD? Here are some questions to consider if you think you may have ADHD:

Does your mind wander while you are working on a task?

Are you easily distracted?

Do you tend to start a project and have difficulty completing it?

Does your attention stray in the middle of a conversation?

Are you forgetful about appointments and regular events?

Do you have difficulty relaxing?

Are you impatient when you need to wait?

Do you fidget and shift constantly in your seat?

Do you commonly lose track of keys, purses and other items?

Do you interrupt others before they finish speaking?

Is it difficult for you to manage or resolve conflicts?

If these issues sound familiar, you may want to consult a healthcare professional.

source: www.lifescript.com

My simple, old digital camera

I really love my simple old digital camera. Why so? Ah, it became a routine piece of equipment in my classroom. With it, I am able to document each of my children’s learning. I was even able to do power point presentation for each of my children which I presented to their parents. So my PTM/PTC (Parent Teacher Meeting/Conference) went well. Thanks to my digital camera.

For pre-school teachers like me who are keen to support their children’s development and learning, and who believe in the best documentation there is, I suggest that you provide yourself a digital camera. It surely will be a great help for you.

Just look at this photo. We say that a photo paints a thousand words. Surely this photo shows how and what my students are doing and learning.

Here are some photo-taking strategies for educators (by Cynthia Hoisington):

* Keep the camera within easy reach in the classroom and charged at all times.

* Take photos unobtrusively, yet often enough so that children get used to seeing you with a camera in your hand.

* Capture the entire structure when photographing any structure that children are building.

* Take individual photos of various structures from approximately the same angles and distances for easier comparison later.

* Have a goal in mind when you take photos of children building. Your goal will influence what you decide to focus.

* Be spontaneous sometimes too. If something that children are building draws your attention or piques you interest, snap it. Don’t worry if you don’t have a goal for every photo.

The Golden Land

The Golden land is the meaning of Suvarnabhumi, pronounced as "Su-Wana-Poon". It is the name of the new mega airport in South East Asia. Suvarnabhumi Airport is the new airport in Bangkok, Thailand. Surely, you will be impressed of its departure hall which is in the style of the Chek Lap Kok airport in Hong Kong.

I am sure you will also be impressed of these. Look. Nice pieces of art works.

(Indirectly stating...)on the effects of divorce

Last month, I wrote a literature review on father's involvement and its effects on the socio-emotional development of children. With the alarming cases of divorce and absent father involvement we hear and see around, I would like to share some informations I gathered.

Negative Effects of an Absent Father Involvement

According to Wayne Matthews, father’s absence, whether physical and or emotional, is a critical problem. (Mathews, 1998) He stated that father’s absence has a great impact on the general behavioral adjustment and aggression in male children. He added that boys are more likely to be involved in crime and violence. In his research, Popenoe has detailed his findings by stating that boys who grew up without father involvement had developed “hyper masculine behavior”. They try to disengage themselves from the dominance of their mothers and gain a male identity. They became angry and fearful and hostile towards women in general. ( Popenoe, 1996)

With regards to the negative effects on girls, earlier studies stated that girls are more likely to get pregnant as teens. (McLanahan & Sandefur, 1994; Sampson, 1987) This finding was also agreed upon by La Crosse. He stated that girls with absent fathers use their bodies to relate to men (LaCrosse, 1997) which were also highlighted by Brott (2003) in his book. He added that fathers can help daughters know that love and sex are not synonymous (LaCrosse, 1997). And so with an absent father, girls tend to find difficulty in distinguishing love from sex. Hetherington suggested in his findings that girls are more likely to blame themselves for the problems that arise from an absent father especially if it is caused by divorce. Hetherington also suggested that those girls are more likely to engage in child sex (1999).

In the general context, research by Byrne, 1997, Horn, 1997, Levine, 1997. Murphy, & Wilson, (1997 ) indicates that children without fathers fail in school three times more often than those in two parent families. They are apt to have more emotional problems which also affect their academic skills. Matthews has proven this earlier by stating that children with no or little contact with their fathers are more likely to drop out of school. (Matthews, 1998)

How it is when an absent father is in conflict with the child’s mother? Does it affect the child’s well-being the more?I believe that the child will be affected especially in his social and emotional skills. He will tend to have behavioral difficulties that will affect his social dealings with his peers as he will tend to be withdrawn. My belief was supported by the findings of Amato and & Keith when they earlier noted that numerous social adjustment difficulties among children may occur, (Amato & Keith, 1991) and by Bowen (1976) who suggested that since the child derive meaning from a significant mother and father and often establish role identification, a child may become confused and disillusioned especially when there is conflict with an absent father.

Positive Effects of Quality Father Involvement

Lamb stated that evidence is mounting that father’s involvement enhances children’s socio-emotional health and well being (Lamb, 1997) and based on my personal experience with my own father, I agree that quality father involvement is effective and has long lasting effects on my own socio-emotional development. Mostly, I believe thatmy father’s involvement benefited me in each stages of development, which I carry within me as I passed through from childhood to our present stage of adulthood. My belief is influenced more recently by the works of Palkovitz (1997), Amato (1998), Marsiglio, Amato, Day and Lamb (2000), and Lamb (2004) who show through their own work or reviewed studies of others, the progress in understanding the contributions fathers make to children’s lives. Pickard quoted the same ideas when he stated that the father has an important potential role at each developmental stage that his children pass through, (Pickard, 1998) which is also supported by Brott (2003) by stating that father involvement has positive effects on young children, adolescents , and children who become young adults. According to Le Menestrel, (1999) Amato (1998) viewed that fathers provide both economic and social capital to children that affects school related behavior and academic achievement, career development, peer relationships, self-esteem and adult outcomes such as achievement, marital happiness and strength of social networks.

With all these related findings, I would like to present the benefits of quality father involvement in each stage. Since positive effects of any kinds bring more encouragement in every one’s lives, I decided to present the positive benefits of quality father’s involvement in details for each stage of human development. Recognizing these positive effects would then encourage further researches for optimal benefits of the children in particular and the whole mankind in general.

Preschool Years

· Better friendships. Three year olds who have positive relationships with their fathers have better friendships when they’re five.
· More cooperation and self-reliance. Children whose fathers regularly looked after them during their infancy and preschool years are more self disciplined and have better social skills, according to Kay Margetts, a researcher at Melbourne University in Australia.
· Smoother separation from Mom. During the time that their children are eighteen months to three year old, father plays one of the most critical roles they will ever play in the role of their child: helping the child safely and securely separate from the intense maternal dependency of infancy, says psychiatrist Kyle Pruett. He believes that as healthy as it is for young children to be depending on their mothers, they’ll never develop their own confidence if they don’t ever establish their physical and emotional autonomy.
· Better problem –solving skills and less frustration. Kids who have involved fathers have a higher tolerance for stress and frustration. As Henry Biller has written, kids are better able to wait their turn for the teacher’s attention, more confident to work on their own, more confident, more willing to try new things.
· More compassion for others. According to researcher Susan Bernadette Shapiro, kindergarten children whose father took more responsibility for limit setting, discipline, and helping children with personal problems and school work had significantly higher empathy scores.
(I presented here the effects on pre-school children only)

As living testament to the positive effects of father’s involvement on the child’s socio-emotional development that encompasses from childhood to adulthood, and which are supported by relevant researches as reviewed and analyzed in this paper, I recognize the fact that a father plays an important role in children’s lives. Being emotionally present in his child’s life, a father enhances his child’s self-esteem and well-being which remain with him till adulthood. With this recognition and understanding, comes the realization that we as early childhood educators should pave the way for the fathers in the centre to be more involved positively with their children. We should as much as possible avoid the devastating negative effects of an absent father involvement in children. Though we could not do anything on a physically absent father, we could help by informing them of how to be an emotionally present father. Therefore, we as teachers in school or centers can respond by including men in our work. We can plan the kind of activities which will involve fathers positively. The next step is to put our plans into actions as soon as possible. With our plans in action, we can then influence the community and the government in implementing actions and reforms that may support positive father involvement.

In short, for those who are contemplating on separation and or divorce, please do consider your decision. Please make decisions with your children's interest in mind.