My Thoughts

Hmm, I am now sitting in front of my home computer and decided to visit this blog site of mine. I decided I better write an entry now, while I am not that occupied yet. Well, I am on my fourth day of school holiday. And on the 23rd of this month, classes will resume again. Therefore, this is the right time for me to write my thoughts, those thoughts that are swaying and dancing in my mind.

1. When my husband suffered a brain attack or stroke for short in December 2007, I almost decided to resign from my teaching job so I could concentrate on my husband. In the end I continued teaching and find an alternative care for him. Now that he is already “well”, I am thankful that I made the right decision. I know in my heart that my pre-school children helped me a lot in coping with my situation. They made me happy, confident and loved even though I felt so lost, scared and confused then.

2. I heard a lot about anti-depressant pills like Prozac. Of course, I have nothing against these pills as long as they are prescribed correctly to the right people who need them. Though there are many articles stating new ideas or research which claims that millions of prescriptions for anti-depressants may be having no medical effect at all on the people taking them, I still cling to that idea that it can cure acute depression. But how to know if a person is suffering from depression? Just because a person is manifesting one or two of the symptoms, the doctor can assessed in one sitting that the patient is depressed? With that, I beg to disagree. Correct me if I am wrong, but I learnt in my Clinical Psychology that a person has to go for a battery of tests before he can be diagnose as suffering from depression. Though I believe that pills can help a lot in curing depression, psychotherapy should not be forgotten also. Why I am saying all these? Because my husband’s rehab doctor prescribed 20 mg of Prozac to be administered for a month without my knowledge. Oh, I was not there when he went for his outpatient appointment. But people could not understand why I was so ANGRY and decided not to give those pills to my husband. Why” marunong pa raw ako sa doctor…”? Well, I am “marunong pa sa doctor” for these reasons:a) the doctor concerned should treat my husband’s post stroke problems and not his well being, he is not a psychiatrist by the way, b) I have my right to refuse prescriptions which I think is not appropriate for him, c) I know my husband’s personality and state of mind. I’ve known him for years compared to this doctor who have known him for only a few months, d) I just don’t believe that my husband is depressed, PERIOD. NOW I am thankful that I never let my husband took a single of those pills. I let him read books on relaxation. I let him do relaxation exercises/techniques too.

3. My husband is back to work already. It has been a month since he went back to work. Though he still got difficulty with walking and he has problems with his posture and balance, I can see that he is progressing day by day. I bought the thread mill and exercise bike for him. He still is undergoing physiotherapy and massotherapy every weekend. I am doing my best to help him recover fully. Though, I need to be patient. But I am sure one day he will his own self again.

4. I will always feel the pain those people had inflicted on me and my daughters. Though I may have forgiven them, I will surely not forget. So please, I have closed the book already. Don’t ever come back to our lives again. We don’t need you.

5. I want to say that we still enjoy TFC here in Singapore. We all like LOBO very much. We like Angel Locsin. She can really act.

Oh, this is getting longer. I better write TO BE CONTINUED….